


Shadow Moses

by rushifaas



Category: Code Geass
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Buckle up, But here it is, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Drama & Romance, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Multi, POV Alternating, Psychological Trauma, SuzaLulu - Freeform, Trauma, Violence, Wingfic, in which a soulmate fic has been made, the one no one asked for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:14:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28639848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rushifaas/pseuds/rushifaas
Summary: I'm in your blindspot, god while I get your rocks off and worship to the beat.I wanna thank you. Come again!That was great, do you need a receipt?I've got blood on my hands, no guilt on my conscience.The war in your path? Your mind is the target!All of my flaws, I wear 'em with honor.I am the enemy.
Relationships: C.C./Lelouch Lamperouge | Lelouch vi Britannia, Euphemia li Britannia/Kururugi Suzaku, Kururugi Suzaku/Lelouch Lamperouge | Lelouch vi Britannia
Comments: 15
Kudos: 12





	1. The Preface.

**Author's Note:**

> hello, hello and happy belated new years! this was on the side and we finally, FINALLY, managed to write it due to some inspiration. plus we just realized we never ever wrote an obligatory soulmate fic. shame on us tbh.
> 
> gonna warn you now, this is a soulmate fic you won't expect. we already have many outlines to write up and yes the end goal is suzalulu you just have to wait to get there. 
> 
> as usual please mind lelouch is a transmale and has DiD in our writings. nunnally is NOT crippled or blind and perhaps the parents are decent.
> 
> enjoy.

"soulmates were a rare thing in this world, even when soulmates had matching wings. not everyone has a soulmate, mind you. some are unfortunate to be without one but be able to love." 

suzaku sneezes as his mother, kohryu, smooths his bangs from his eyes. his father genbu wasn't one for tenderness towards him as he saved it for his mother. his parents were soulmates and had wings that were a matching ruby plumes with bright sapphire roots. his father has bigger wings as his mother medium length, while his own were small and growing. an ashy white with faded green at the tips, suzaku was confused to the difference of color.

"maybe your wings are like this because of your soulmate, my little bird. our clan bloodlines never have matching colors." 

suzaku smiles brightly as his mother peppers kisses on his freckled cheeks, causing him to squeal and flail slightly. he had much easier times as a young, bright eyed boy with visions of peace and happiness. little did he know it'd change so drastically so soon.

□□

soulmates were quite rare for those without wings so humans all had wings. like his mother said, there were those who went on without their soulmates but kept their wings. you couldn't rip off anyone's wings because they were a hardened bone -- there was no brittleness and there had been no ways to crush it with  _ any _ force. you had to be a divine creator to do such force and there really wasn't a definite one.

but what shocked suzaku in his years of growing older, by the age of ten, he had rage when seeing that his father ripping out the pretty feathers of dearest mother's wings and shouting at her with words he didn't understand.

"you  _ whore _ ! how can you have a second soulmate, with  _ a britannian _ no less?!" genbu was unstoppable when enraged and suzaku had to watch as his mother flailed helplessly under his weight, screaming at his father to stop. he was unable to move as he covers his tearing eyes when the sound of bone and other unidentified sounds filled his ears.

kohryu had been murdered by genbu on his birthday, and he had stabbed his father in the head by shoving it through his left eye. 

blood and brain matter was the last thing he remembers before blacking out. 

□□

"suzaku, are you up there?  _ hey _ !" magenta feathers dance lazily in the air as a young woman of seventeen flew up to a rather elaborate treehouse. her hair was long, pink and bouncy with eyes bright and violet. she wore frilly dresses with gentle shades of eyeshadow so her pale skin would be complimented. she was so very kind, so pure and naive while having a presence of tender love around her. 

her name is euphemia li britannia and she is suzaku kururugi's childhood friend -- not to mention girlfriend of three years. 

suzaku looks up from his rickety wooden desk with documents, stacked books and used papers scattered about. his eyes brightened up as she perches herself on the makeshift windowsill, heart thumping when she gives him a shy wave. 

euphemia is truly suzaku's angel. breathtaking and the light that saved him all those years ago when she and her older sister cornelia found him. it had been a surprise since cornelia was part of a service that handled domestic abuse especially when wings were involved. 

it was super cathartic to watch as his fathers corpse had been tossed to predator beasts, having watched them feed. he was even grateful when his mothers funeral was small and private, burying her by the shrine and by the sunflower fields. suzaku felt some sort of closure since then as he afterwards begun to process the trauma as it unraveled. 

if it weren't for euphemia, suzaku knew he'd be screwed.

"hey, sorry euphi. been busy." he slid his chair back as he glanced at his assortment of written notes and the textbooks of wing biology. he took easy strides as she scurries over to him and he catches her in his embrace with a shared kiss following. the kiss involved the taste of their tongues, the sound of soft moans and pressing of their warm bodies. if anything, suzaku runs his hand onto her left breast and pinches her sensitive nipple.

they had been shy with these things at first and suzaku didn't care for soulmates because he instantly fell for euphemia. their first time was around fifteen years old since they began to date at fourteen. this would be their fourth year where they were known to be the young couple that have a love so pure and their sexual adventures were considered healthy. 

if anything, he was and always will be grateful for euphemia to be his first. 

□□

after a daily session of 'bonding' , euphemia and suzaku read through written notes and pages of text with great concentration. suzaku had a current dream to ensure wings couldn't have their feathers ripped off the bone since the trauma of seeing his mother in that situation. plus with euphemia at his side she as well was in danger of that rage. he just can't bother seeing her beautiful wings destroyed. 

"hey! suzaku, what's on your mind?" euphemia gently nudges him with her elbow, snapping the brunette from his deep thoughts. she doesn't know the extent of what happened to his family situation. just that they found him outside of the shrine steps looking pale and void of life.

suzaku shook his head as emerald eyes glance at the diagrams of the different variation wing bone sizes. "i just recently figured out that no matter the size of the wing, they can't be broken. even if they happen to be extremely small. it's baffling that the feathers aren't strong as well." suzaku sighs as he rolls up the parchment papers, tucking them in his oriental vase with a phoenix on it. while gathering the rest of the papers to put away, euphemia wandered to the many books where suzaku pressed dry flowers on each page.

"maybe there was just a compensation for it. like the flowers here? they withstand so much but can be easily plucked." euphemia states as she stopped at a page, finger trailing across a dry rose bud.

maybe they were all just so fragile and it makes suzaku's stomach churn in horrible realization.

□□

if suzaku was nervous about anything it was about euphemia's older half brother and charles' favorite son. they met once when he returned with cornelia and euphemia, that brother stood silently at their fathers side with those creepy, emotionless amethyst eyes. suzaku never asked for his name since all he did was shuffle away, being led by a woman with long black hair and a smile so motherly. 

he came to learn that her name was marianne and she was charles' favorite wife and a woman cornelia very much admired. her wings were the reason why charles loves her more than the rest of his concubines, they had matching set. they were soulmates. midnight blue at the roots to where it shifted to indigo blue to the tips of the feathers. they were like falcon wings so they weren't soft at the touch. 

and now, hours later after he and euphemia left the treehouse, marianne and her nameless son visited -- along with a small girl with long, wavy dirty blond hair and violet eyes. he stood with euphemia with a welcoming smile, allowing the woman to embrace him tightly. 

"suzaku! it's been so long! you've grown in the past two years! you as well, euphi!" marianne giggles as she places kisses on each of their foreheads. she promptly turns to the two with her, "lelouch! nunnally! come say hello." she ushers her two children forward. this makes euphemia squeal happily and give each a warm embrace. suzaku stands there with his usual goofy, aloof smile as euphemia stands back. he is unsure how to proceed from there.

"i'm nunnally. it's nice to meet you, suzaku kururugi!" nunnally was at least thirteen years of age, and her wings were tiny but they developed it's initial form. they were a light cyan with silver, almost like miniature swan wings. suzaku knew she'd be a beauty just like euphemia when she gets older. plus, nunnally just has this aura of kindness about her that makes suzaku want to protect her. 

"nice to meet you too, nunnally." suzaku gave her a small bow with a smile on his face, and the young girl giggles and does a small courtsey in response. 

"i am lelouch, i suppose i'm pleased to meet my dearest sisters  _ significant other _ ." his hair was silky and dark like his mothers, framing his face. he was long, thin and seemed so fragile like a porcelain doll that it was even amazing he was an offspring of charles. his voice was haughty in which grinded suzaku's nerves but euphemia giggles because she knows lelouch more than anyone else.

marianne is pleased by the successful start and she claps her hands together, "we're here because i'm going to go on an important trip! they'll be spending a month here! my precious children mean the world to me!" she brings nunnally and lelouch into a group hug, nuzzling into them with glee. but suzaku noticed that something was missing from lelouch because you seen it everyday. and since he is so impulsive a question just bursts from his mouth without thinking.

"where are your wings, lelouch?" 

the question of course puts lelouch on the spot, marianne smiles and it was strained, nunnally held onto her brother's hand rather tightly. the atmosphere was tense, euphemia biting her lower lip as she gives her half siblings an apologetic look. it wasn't needed since lelouch waves it off dismissively as if he isn't bothered because truthfully, he's been asked this for so long. suzaku seems to not catch the tense atmosphere - understandably so - and lelouch gives him a charming smile, if it weren't for the fact he looked like a snake with those cold amethyst eyes.

"my wings aren't any of importance." lelouch cooly responds as if the very topic bores him. nunnally tenses ever so slightly besides him that he rubs his thumb over her knuckles as if to soothe. euphemia let out a breath she wasn't aware she was holding and marianne hums.

before suzaku can even respond, marianne claps her hands together. 

"inside children! let's go!"

and so they went.

□□

this was the first time suzaku actually was in the same vicinity of charles and the wide man was simply intimidating.  _ hell _ , it even put his bastard of a father to great shame. not to mention he always wondered how charles of all people managed to have such attractive looking children - save for the first born but no one cared for him. so when marianne had the small group gather in the large dining area (  _ with cornelia _ ) they all sat properly on the couches with the man entering somewhat later.

the air was suddenly suffocating and suzaku can't help but hold in his breath. 

"ah, my dearest children and my clever son. i'm sure marianne already informed you of the important trip. you are to be under this roof and learning from tutors i have established for you." charles strokes his large (  _ and ridiculous _ ) beard as the young ones absorbed the information. they wouldn't understand how the world worked since they were in their own birdcages, no parent would want their young chicks out of the nest in a tender age. flying was something to master in their teen years so it's considered a sense of maturity by grand populace.

suzaku as usual sits at attention with euphemia leaning against him. it's not a surprise that they'd have tutors. it was just unfortunate britannians hated the japanese and he unwillingly had to study britannian topics just in order to have a roof over his head. it was simply and utterly degrading but suzaku thankfully managed to endure those long years, finding it less painful than the shitshow genbu gave.

" _ i see _ ," lelouch drawls out in a bored tone as he examines perfect manicured nails, "if i'm here for a month i might as well do something of my time. are there war logs for me to read?" his deep amethyst eyes never met anyone's gaze, letting nunnally take his hand and admire the fingernail art. charles of course walks over to one of many bookcases as marianne followed like a graceful butterfly. lelouch's eyes followed the two like prey, jaw set while everyone else watched in curious manner. the youngest male heir had such a fascination with strategy and war tactics since he was so young that charles sent him to high ranked studies. the result didn't disappoint in the slightest.

charles pulls out a blue leatherbound book, opening it as the pages were filled with scribbles, graphs, diagrams and so on. "on this particular bookshelf, you'll find as you need. do as you wish but keep them in pristine condition."  _ as these are the original _ were the unsaid words as he closes it and returns it to it's spot. the stocky man didn't have to see to  _ know _ lelouch was grinning like the infamous cheshire cat, or the fact his unusual eyes were glittering in anticipation. 

suzaku suddenly felt uneasy from the unspoken conversation and his stomach plummets. it was strange that euphemia didn't seem bothered by this.

□□

the dead of night usually means to sleep but there were rebels that sought out different means of passing the time. euphemia was one of said rebels as she walks into lelouch's room without any resistance and simply sat on his bed as he stared at a few documents hanging on the north wall of the room.

"dearest sister." euphemia smiles widely at his simple greeting, she giggles in response. once upon a time she had such a puppy crush on him that she and nunnally made bets on who would marry him. the princess hums as she swings her legs back and forth on the edge of his bed; watching as he picks up sheets of paper from his work desk and pins them onto the wall. euphemia always found his hobbies strange yet he was completely intellectual with his plans. 

he did help their father with large rebellions, squashing them easily. she did wonder if ot was because he played sooo many chess games. " _ lulu _ ! already busy and you just got here. why don't you sleep a little?" euphemia gently scolds though the smile on her face says otherwise. the answer was obvious since lelouch was such a busy bee due to his uneasiness of remaining still. euphemia reasons it's due to his nightmares…. 

_"euphemia -- i'm so sorry." lelouch says with tears_ _falling down his cheeks when he grabs at her hand one night. they just celebrated euphi's tenth birthday and the party was being cleaned up, euphemia already heading for bed._

_ the young princess blinks at her older half brother's sudden outburst, taking his shaking hand into his. "lulu? why are you crying? what's wrong? you didn't miss my birthday!" she smiles in hopes he'd cheer up. sure lelouch wasn't sociable with their family but he still came and euphemia spent most of her birthday with him. nunnally was still a small baby. but when he shakes his head frantically euphemia knew he was serious. so they retreat to their hidden spot on the rooftop garden and they sit underneath the wisteria tree.  _

_ "i'm sorry i killed you, euphi. i didn't mean too -- i swear. i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry."  _

_ it hurt euphemia's heart because she absolutely knew what he spoke of. without an answer she pulls him into a tight embrace and they both broke down into a sob. _

"euphi? are you thinking of something silly?" lelouch questions her as he notices his half sister lost in thought and euphemia simply smiles brightly at him. lelouch knew that euphemia was and is his absolute counter balance due to their love for others and the world. they were often the pair that planned and euphemia usually executed her dearest lulu's plans with her innocent grace. the princess giggles as she gets up from the bed, hugging him tightly afterwards. he has grown so much that she was glad he was slightly taller than her. 

"just thinking how happy i am since you're here!" she pinches his cheeks which only brings about a surprise laugh from lelouch. her heart warms up considerably at how much warmth it held -- something different when he had been a quiet child. 

□□

and that night, when suzaku finally sleeps he dreams of blood blood red mixed with pink sakura petals. he dreams of a strange symbol that seemed to be etched onto the petals and it causes him great fear --  _ and unease _ . he can hear voices in his dreams in which they were muddled to the point he felt like he was underwater. 

…….

suzaku woke up in a cold sweat in the early morning with his wings puffed up and feathers scattered in the air.

….

and he sneezes.


	2. The... other preface?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little short but for lelouch's side.
> 
> also we were given a challenge by our discord friends for a code geass fic and it will be alice in wonderland themed. we will be shifting through fics because autistic brain cant keep focus on one. so sorry for the scatteredness.

suzaku had learned that the subject of wings (  _ regarding lelouch _ ) was a no no topic (  _ once again regarding lelouch _ ) when they were living under the same roof. the next morning marianne and charles both left swiftly with their goodbyes said and a silence left afterwards. before it became awkward with the four of them in the same room the ever dutiful bodyguard jeremiah came to escort them to their respective tutors. if anything suzaku wished that he didn't have to be stared at from all angles by his so called tutors. 

"how was your session, suzaku?" nunnally smiles as she approached him, as usual on her wheelchair. the brunette blinked, looking down at her with a soft smile. she truly was opposite of her older brother who seemed truly a mystery. the young girl smiles brightly as she sees his smile, "i'm glad. do you want to come with me to the garden?" she asks and suzaku gave her a look of surprise.

he never really felt kindness from anyone else besides euphemia so this was a fresh of breath air. " _ of course _ . where is your  **brother** ?" suzaku can't help but ask as he walks with her since his curious nature often got the best of him. he hasn't seen lelouch since their parents left in which, in all honesty, made him concerned. suzaku doesn't understand why it does. 

all he could do is be a good little soldier or lest he be punished.

□□

lelouch hated wings and he can't fathom why. maybe it was because all his life people had to show off their wings in front of him, making him  _ quite envious _ of their beauty. all his life he had to endure the torture. his physical appearance was one of beauty and others lust for him, but they would only value him for wings. what a disgusting world.

"who decided wings were the deciding factor of one's worth?" lelouch scowls when he sees the damned advertisement's of wing care and what not all over tokyo. his grip was tight around his parasol, protecting pale skin from the harsh sun. with a soft sigh, he decided to head back to that  _ suffocating _ estate. perhaps if it were  **just** euphemia he'd be more willing. that boy from years ago lives there now much to his dismay. he doesn't quite like that boy -  _ suzaku, right? _ \- since he gave off a vibe of danger. 

but he knew he wasn't one to talk of others being a danger.  _ life is dull! _ how can one be content with such a stagnant existence and purpose? no one could truly be happy this way. lelouch scuffs his boot against the concrete with a pout. he rarely had power due to his bastard father, especially being a lowest ranking prince of the offspring. should he be angry? who would agree to help him? absolutely no one is dedicated to an awful system.

" _ hey _ ! watch out!" and then lelouch felt himself fall forward when something collided into him, the impact knocking him out. well, it would have if it weren't for the fact he is used to these situations regarding assassinations, his cheek pressed painfully against the ground. lelouch got on his knees as he glanced over to see a woman with messy red hair and blue eyes, wearing one of the **knight of round** uniform. he grimaced with a scowl plain on his face. "working for the bloody tyrant?" he can't help but hiss as he got to his feet with a glare on her visage. 

well, that pissed her off since she grabs him by the scruff of his collar and brings him close to her face. "what's that, you asshole?! does it look like i enjoy working for a family of  **_leeches_ ** ?" she barks at him, lelouch finding it  _ amusing _ by her reaction. she doesn't give him time to answer when tossing his body like a ragdoll onto the ground. well this is the second time he's been  **_rudely_ ** manhandled in a day. she stamped her heeled form down as her knight badge shined brightly above her left breast. he sees the roman numeral for 5 on it along with a sculpture of her side profile. 

lelouch stands as he twirls his parasol over his shoulder, finally noticing her translucent red wings wrapped around her thin waist. of course. his father always cared for appearances even of those in the rounds. "apologies. i have somewhere to be." a lie as he walks away to return back to that hellhole of a home. he would have done so if it weren't for this woman following him with an aura of anger.

she grabs him roughly by his shoulder and yanks him back, "wait… you're one of  _ his _ kids. aren't you supposed to be bedridden?" she frowns at him. she tugs him closer to stare rather intensely at his face and lelouch hisses to express his discomfort. he had simply wanted to roam around in shibuya to clear his mind.

"kallen, you're scaring the small dude." 

"shut up, gino. it's one of the emperor's kids who's supposed to be ill." 

lelouch tenses when he sees the knight of three approach with an all too friendly behavior. great, just great. the woman (  **named kallen** ) releases him just to kick her fellow knight in the shin. he shook his head, glaring at the concrete ground when he noticed gino's watery cyan wings. they reminded him of fish fins. couldn't he just get some peace? he steps back when gino walks over to examine him with a friendly grin on his face, "well, i don't think i know you. you got a name?"

" _ yes _ but i'd rather not give it to someone like you." lelouch took a step back since gino wanted to stare at his face. he knew he's attractive but not to  _ this _ extent. wouldn't euphemia or cornelia be somebody to gawk at? so he closes his parasol and whacks the knight with it in attempts to get him away. kallen decided to have other plans as she grabs him oh so gracefully and heaves him onto gino's shoulder.

"excuse me?!"

"don't worry your princeliness," said a smug kallen, "we'll escort you home." 

lelouch opts to not believe that in the slightest.


	3. begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> plot plot plot plot plot.

suzaku never did understand the bond between her and lelouch, having joined her when she decided to spend time with said brother. euphemia mentioned that lelouch was deeply upset since the knights of round dragged him back from his wanderings; suzaku was seriously overjoyed when he saw it was kallen and gino. lelouch was crabby and had retreated to his room hours ago.

"hm… maybe lelouch would want to try on some clothes." euphemia thoughtfully says as she turns to her boyfriend with a smile on her face. when suzaku gave her a clueless blink she let out a giggle. "well, i never told you but me and nunnally dressed lelouch up in girl clothes when we were like, nine." she explains, making suzaku snort at the mental image. just the idea of lelouch wearing something like one of euphemia's dresses was  **hilarious** . he couldn't help but find it funny.

euphemia grins as she pulls out some of her clothes from a closet, suzaku can see they were mostly dresses and he burst out laughing. suzaku wouldn't ever imagine  _ himself _ wearing his girlfriend's clothes even if he wouldn't be against it. it's mostly because he'd rather not rip them up since he was built bigger than euphemia. 

"besides, he needs to have a distraction from the knights. speaking of -- aren't you going to apply for a position?" euphemia inquired as she stacks the pile on one of her arms. the question catches suzaku off guard but he gives her a goofy grin (  _ he pretends _ ) before answering, "well, kind of pointless since he's gone right now. it's almost been at least a week." an agonizing long week, in which charles leaving elsewhere put a dent to his plans. perhaps he shouldn't have procrastinated while researching the history of wings. that was his issue unfortunately.

or maybe he had been scared of initial rejection. suzaku couldn't tell what was the real issue. 

"okay, let's go my dearest knight! we have a damsel in distress to cheer up!" she cheers as she grabs him by the wrist to drag him oit of her room.

□□

"the reason we're here is because one of your children has yet to present their wings." the current prime minister named ohgi, questions charles and marianne with a  _ skeptical _ expression. it's  **known** by all nations that each of the britannian heirs have revealed their wings publicly in their life. it's obvious between all leaders that they spoke of lelouch vi britannia.

the young woman named kaguya clears her throat, "the chinese families are displeased -- or rather those who work for their empress. does your child have wings or not?" she looks tired yet irritated at the european rulers. her knuckles were white as she grips her pen. her fellow leaders nod in their agreement. 

"oh, he's simply stubborn. does it matter if he has no wings? he's a complicated boy." marianne gives a dazzling smile as she examines her nails. charles snorts as he strokes his beard in thought. of course the other nations would be concerned about their children due to rising power. 

"i don't see how the wings of my last child would change the balance. he is a mere insignificance and the lowest of the ranks. you'd have no need to worry." charles' voice booms and the other leaders cringe at his confidence. some of them bit back biting remarks for the sake of keeping the peace. until one of the japanese council spoke their mind.

"you agreed to have each of your children show their wings for the trust system, as you agreed. what are you hiding about the child?" 

"ah, tohdoh. we aren't hiding anything, but honestly he just has  **no** wings. so he won't be in power for the throne of our nation." marianne smiles sweetly, not caring if she just dropped an important secret. even charles seemed unfazed by it. 

kaguya stares at them with a frown, "and you're not bothered by this weakness? you said you'd never have a wingless child." it's odd to her (  **_and everyone else_ ** ) that charles would allow such a child to exist. given how their family tree eradicated all weakness so their empire remained strong. charles certainly didn't change those ways given how he scattered his children all over.

marianne simply gave them a dazzling smile which made kaguya pale ever so slightly.

"why ever not? i  _ love _ my children,  **_of course not_ ** ."

□□

"oh, this color is simply pretty, big brother! euphemia knows her taste." nunnally giggles after euphemia dresses lelouch up in a frilly purple and white dress, clapping her hands as she picks up snow white stockings with floral lacing. she smiles as she puts them on both of her older brother's legs to finish it off. she giggles even more when lelouch let out an annoyed huff while euphemia added the hair extensions. 

suzaku held back a snicker as he's glad he wasn't under the torture of the two's torture, grinning as lelouch shot him a glare. "sorry, lelouch, you just look like a really convincing girl. euphi did really well." he can't help but laugh as lelouch shoved him but to no avail. wow, lelouch  _ really _ wasn't that strong. would it be insulting if he casually mentioned if euphi was slightly stronger.

lelouch kicked at his shin, "yes,  _ it is  _ very insulting since you said it  **aloud** !" and euphemia laughs as she gently pats lelouch on his cheek. suzaku bashfully smiles with an apologetic expression which makes lelouch fume. "and you're just mocking me, now! of all the nerve you bring to my face." he hisses, moving euphi's hand away as he begins to undress. seeing this, his two sisters turn and push suzaku out of lelouch's room.

"privacy is next to godliness, suzaku! i want to go to the park!" euphemia cheers as nunnally clung to suzaku's right arm. 

"yes, yes. the park sounds lovely doesn't it?" nunnally giggles, closing the door behind them as they move suzaku away.

lelouch tosses the dress onto his bed as the cool air hits his skin, making him shiver. he's grateful that his sisters dragged out suzaku, not wanting to reveal that he wasn't biologically male. it hurts his heart as he stares into the mirror, the reflection painfully reminding him of his too thin figure and pointed hips. 

(  _ "but you're perfect, lelouch. even if you don't think so." gentle yet calloused fingers stroke along bony hips, sending shivers down his spine. those words make his heart weep in joy at those tender words as strong arms hold him close. for now he wasn't hated by the britannians and japanese, and was just lelouch being smothered by affection. _ )

a frown is on lelouch's face since he can't recall who said those words. he's sure that whoever it was is simply a figment of his quiet desires to be treated fairly, to be loved as he is. he inhales as he pulls on a woolen black sweater then tugging out a pair of red and black plaid jeggings. then he pulls out three bracelets from his jewelry box. one from nunnally, one from euphemia and one from his mother.

"... guess i shouldn't keep business waiting." he sighs, rubbing his temples.

□□

"hold up! is that who i think it is?" euphemia tugs suzaku and nunnally behind a bench, which made both make surprised noises.

"euphi, what?"

"what's wrong, euphemia?"

instead of answering, the pinkette gestures towards the direction that caught her attention. the three spot lelouch walking past them from a good distance, heading for a black car on the opposite side. euphemia took out three sunglasses with a determined expression on her face. "we're going undercover, dears. i need to know what lulu is up to!" she puts hers on, nunnally and suzaku follows suit. 

they certainly looked silly. now all they have to do is get closer…

"you know, i usually don't take requests from shady people." lelouch calmly greets as the window rolled down, revealing a masked individual. lelouch raises a brow, "a kitsune mask, hm? japanese?" he hums as he tilts his head with a contemplating expression.

" **you're one to aid those harmed against britannia's rule, correct? you've ought to be careful posting on social media even under an alias** ." what a deep voice -- a voice changer? of course, at least lelouch had the audacity to use color changing contacts and style his hair by slicking it back. 

lelouch hums, "yes, i am. you know me as l.l., now…"

" **yes, of course. the items will be delivered by the earliest tomorrow. your payment is… rather generous** ."

lelouch only cocks a smug smile as he enters the vehicle as the door opens.


	4. bendy straws.

ever since the black car and masked figure, suzaku was uneasy. he couldn't focus on his research notes in his treehouse and the chill cold of the winter air didn't help either. euphemia had to go with cornelia for their girl time since she had a week of break which made suzaku be by himself. nunnally was at physical therapy and lelouch. well, lelouch was seen last talking to jeremiah in an empty room in which said bodyguard closed the door before he could figure out more. it bugged suzaku as the feeling of ants crawled up and down his arms, wondering about the kitsune mask.

"it's of japanese origin… to boldly wear one isn't a crime but it can bring a scene." not only that bothers suzaku. lelouch leaving with those masked strangers shot alarms all inside of him, and euphemia was concerned as well. he did ask euphi about it and all she did was give him a sweet smile.

(  _ "lelouch is an  _ **_odd one_ ** _ , suzaku. his brain doesn't function like ours." _ )

"uughhh, i can't think!" he whines as he slams his head against the writing desk in frustration, brain swirling with many loud thoughts. wing research, lelouch's entire identity and those masked strangers. he inhales while squeezing his eyes shut. it's none of his business, none of his business, none of --

( _ "class, this is suzaku kururugi. he is the first japanese to enroll at our ashford academy." the homeroom teacher blandly says as said new student stood there with a blank expression. there were whispers along with judging looks sent suzaku's way, the gossip already starting. _

_ "ah, thank you for the welcome. i hope we have a good school year." suzaku bows, tensing as some laugh. he keeps his eyes trained on the floor as his wings slowly wrap around himself as if to shield him. this as well seemed to be a mistake. _

_ "ew! look how green they are! color of puke, gross gross gross!" _

_ "well, he IS japanese…" _

_ "and they aren't that big either! think they're just for show?" _

_ "you know what they say: small wings, small dick!" _

_ suzaku felt his cheeks burn as he stood up straight, a strained smile on his face. he can see them all: their wings and the faint glows emitting from the tips. so quick to judge since their wings were thought to be superior. it made him feel disgust. _ )

"it's lelouch's problem. as long as he doesn't involve his sisters…" he picks up the notelog he scribbled in during college days. he flips it open to the first page and begins to mumble to himself.

[  **wings were always with the humans, starting from the first ancient civilizations. there are records from at least the ancient greeks and romans. some say the ancient gods valued wings as connection to higher heavens; in thus when moses made the testaments he made it clear wings gave you the right to eternal afterlife.**

**wings never could be ripped from their owner and it's been said that the god's didn't want their creations to be vulnerable. wings are the absolute gift given once someone is born into the world. it's said to the newborn with wings is to be blessed for eternal fortune. those without wings are cursed to eternal damnation.** ]

suzaku runs his fingers on the wrinkled paper with a sigh. "there was a page missing in the book i was researching. actually… it seems there were a lot more missing in other books." he turns a few pages where his scribbling handwriting appeared hurried. 

[  **in japan, soulmates have been brought up for two lovers that carry on a lifelong bond. this was first implemented from an ancient clan named the kugane's. the kugane originated from split off members of china when a revolution broke out, in which had been forced to ask for aid from france and germany.**

**this caused a merging of european and asian countries, sharing their cultures and research on wings. the concept of soulmates were heavily accepted, connected to the concept of the red string of fate. wings and the red string were needed to make marriage, essentially to share one mind. the kugane made it known that they heavily keep the soulmate tradition.**

**there had been a betrayal from both sides, japan framed and placed them as slaves under the rising power known as the britannians; the emperor being lancelot vi britannia. lancelot destroyed japan's culture as well as stripped some clan's powers -- some being left to squander and struggle...** ] 

suzaku  _ huffs _ as there wasn't anything else to read, groaning because the history of japan is incredibly altered. shoving his books aside, his ears perk up when he hears voices. he moves from his chair to peek out of the window to see lelouch with some masked individuals. his body tenses up as his fingers dig into the wood, hissing under his breath.

"lelouch, you idiot…! what are you doing?" 

□□

' **l.l., we are glad to see you are taking use of our shipment** .'

" _ of course _ . i'll take pleasure in using everything to aid your cause." the prince smoothly says as he leads the two towards one of his hidden spots. it was a garden that had a secret passage, even though he set up precautions to make sure intruders would be punished. he made each opening a rotation so no one can guess it right. he enjoyed watching idiots fall to their demise attempting to get inside.

"you're late. you three take a long time." sighs a woman with long green hair and amber colored eyes. she looks at the masked figures with a hum. "and it seems my  _ so called superiors _ are here." her voice drawls as she picks up a slice of pizza. her body was cyborg like with her wings long and a shimmery red that draped on her sides. she happened to be the merch lelouch paid for and also the blooming regret in which he did.

the one with the blue fox mask laughs calmly, "remember  **_your_ ** place, yes? you may be an old model little witch however, you're just a  **refurbished junk** ." their gloved hand waves dismissively as they join their coworker at the elegant garden table. lelouch hums as he pours lavender tea into his cup, knowing there wouldn't be a way for his masked guests to drink.

"you have any  _ bendy straws _ ? it smells really good." the fox with the red lotus blossoms chimes as they watch l.l. pour the delicious drink. everyone knew tea was common for europeans just as much as the japanese except… oolong and matcha was much more tasty. the three were amused as the prince sputtered at the question that c.c. burst out laughing with her wings fluttering behind her. 

" _ shut up _ , witch!" lelouch snaps at her which just makes her laugh even more. he huffs as c.c. tossed down her fourth pizza box and pulls out straws shaped like the mascot cheese-kun. the masked figure claps their hands eagerly as the winged android places a pink one into their filled cup. "wonderful, and you?" lelouch asks the other guest with an indifferent expression despite being  _ suddenly _ exhausted. 

as their coworker stirred their tea with the straw, the other masked figure hummed. "so, l.l…. i find it surprising you'd have us come here where prying eyes could see us." they bring up a finger, wagging it as if scolding him. lelouch gives them a small chuckle as he sets down the teapot with a little shrug. " _ careless _ ! i like that! it'd help out against the royal family. our resistance has been doing well for all it's worth. to think a britannian would want…"

"now, now, shika-chan! don't give poor l.l. a heart attack. 

"oh, i jest, hachi-chan! l.l. is so cute like a button."

c.c.'s laughter increases louder in volume.

□□

"lelouch, who were those two?" suzaku had hissed when pulling aside the prince after the prince took a shower. they were both men so he didn't think of it to be a big deal when confronting him. lelouch glares at him as he dries off, wet hair sticking to his cheeks. 

"that is none of your business. and don't you know it's impolite to barge on someone in the baths?!" lelouch snarls at him with a flushed face, turning his back on suzaku as he went to get dressed. he grabs his loose cashmere sweater, "you're such a busybody." he's glad that not all of him was exposed thanks to wearing his thong. he didn't even notice that c.c. approached from behind just to shove a fresh, clammy fish down the back of suzaku's shirt.

the sound of suzaku's shrill screams follow after.


	5. zero & L.L.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope the plot twist coming soon will be your favorite. for the topic of lelouch and his wings, and the strange identity...

lelouch was obviously pissed off during the time remaining of the month. it bothered suzaku for reasons he couldn't explain, especially when those masked individuals kept coming to discuss business with lelouch. euphi and nunnally didn't find it too concerning since they knew how lelouch operated; jeremiah himself wasn't too concerned about it. it was almost like the royal family is completely lax when it came to security measures however gino and kallen say differently.

"it's not like there's no security, it's more like we are fast enough to react." kallen explains as she spreads apricot jam on her toast as suzaku sat on her bar stool with a matcha frappuccino from **_galaxy deer_ ** . gino hums from his spot on the couch, turning pages of the newspaper he was busying himself with. "euphemia and nunnally are usually sleeping in hard to reach rooms anyways. i'd be more concerned about that treehouse of yours." kallen points her butterknife accusingly to the brunet. she grins when he huffed and puffed his cheeks out.

gino crossed one of his legs as kallen sat on one of the lounge chairs, "plus, our friend anya did put safety measures in this place. everyone thinks the emperor shows weakness without protection but that's not true. the true protection comes from each of his kids." the blond says rather dismissively as suzaku stares at them blankly. gino wrinkles his nose, "trust me on this one, suzaku. you need to apply for the rounds, yeah?" he grins, rolling up the britannian news and tossed it at his friend.

"i can't if the emperor isn't here!" suzaku exclaims as he catches the rolled up papers, scowling at his friend. that was one reason but he was scared to even try considering him being the prize of the emperor. no one else knew this besides euphi and he was trying to find a way to work up the courage. suzaku always chickened out when he couldn't even request an application to imaginary charles during his practices. 

kallen finishes her toast and sucks off the jam remaining on her fingers, "he comes tomorrow around early morning. get ready because i'll put in a word for you." she grins despite suzaku's protesting babbles.

□□

c.c. stares at lelouch from her perch on the expensive looking couch wearing her straightjacket, watching him read through the war logs on his bed. the artificial life ponders the existence of him since she dreamt, and if she recalls, she cannot dream. dreams of a contract with a power binding the two together, the symbol so familiar on her own forehead. she runs her fingers across the symbol hidden behind green bangs as sounds of paper turning echo. these dreams caused c.c. to question something so trivial.

"lelouch." she blandly says as she stares at him, her chin resting against her hands. "your father comes tomorrow. what do you plan to do?" 

lelouch closes the war log.

"c.c., what do you think of wings?" he sets the worn out book onto his nightstand, his gaze staring at the family photos on the wall. he wanted to tell her something so vulnerable, something that his parents didn't know. when c.c. raises a brow he gestures her to come over. "turn the lights off, or dim them. i don't want any curious ears nearby."

she dims the lights as she walks towards him, "i think wings are gifts not meant for any of us. perhaps we had been pitied for being such a weak species. why?" she sits next to lelouch on the edge of the bed, green hair draping over her shoulders when her head tilts. now that she thinks about it… her amber eyes scan his form as he offers a wistful gaze. it perplexes c.c. that she inhales softly. "but i'm not human even if i used to be. the significance of wings doesn't apply to me." she clarifies while he turns so his suddenly exposed back is presented to him. 

"... excuse … "

"feel the shoulder blades, c.c. and commit it to memory. don't speak of it at all when you leave this room."

"okay…? but how…" c.c. stops when her fingers felt…. 

her amber eyes widened in shock.

□□

"mother, mother. i'm so glad you're back!" nunnally exclaims as she rushes into her mothers embrace. euphemia and lelouch followed after with less than enthusiastic expressions. it was apparent that charles wasn't with marianne so they could breathe a little bit easier. "did you bring gifts?" nunnally beams up at her and marianne chuckles at her daughter's eagerness. leave it to the young girl to ask for foreign presents outside of britannia.

lelouch glances at euphemia as nunnally drags marianne's attention (  _ literally _ ) away. "where is your suzaku?" he asks in disinterest as he found it odd that said suspect wasn't joining his half sister by the hip. he's not sure why he's amused inwardly by his disappearance considering his heart soars with glee. however euphi's answer makes his heart drain… he couldn't fathom why. 

"he's applying for the rounds. so he's possibly…." euphi's voice began to be drowned out as fear hits him. why would  _ anyone _ be so willing to join such an awful thing? charles attempted to mimic the round table as if  **_he_ ** was the king arthur leading it. suzaku was purely japanese if lelouch recalls so why? why aid the very creature that used japan's resources to speed european development? the japanese didn't understand that they were still being oppressed even if their homes were kept in good shape and their language remaining. 

it was the traditions that were stripped so many centuries ago, nothing remained to jog anyone's memories. it infuriates lelouch as it all started when kallen willingly joined the ranks to provide for her struggling family. thankfully euphemia took his hands firmly so he was able to break out of those terrible thoughts. in the distance he can see marianne and nunnally head on inside so they could catch up on the month that flew by. 

"lelouch… you look like you're about to… hm… cry?" euphemia is worried as she squeezes his slender, thin hands. she understood as they both slowly regained memories of that horrible massacre that never actually happened. it felt so real though, so real to the point both cried in their rooms when the anguish and despair crushes them. it had been euphemia to run to her brother in a panic.

lelouch gives her a tired smile, "euphi… do you remember anything else before the massacre?" his gaze directed itself elsewhere -- suddenly finding the gardens too crowded and stifling. he inhales when she leans against him with her head resting on his shoulder.

"no… but i remember your sorrow and your tears after… and how i wished to tell you that i forgive and still love you."

□□

suzaku felt sick to his stomach as charles stared down at him as he requested an audience, having expressed his desire to join the knights of round. the queasy feeling doesn't ease as charles strokes his overcomplicated beard in thought because oh gods why did kallen do this to him? he should have known than to think she was simply bluffing and he happened to be buzzing in nervousness. suzaku silently prays to the kami for good luck on his part.

"hm… i truly didn't expect someone like you to request such a position, even having the knight of five go to me about it." his voice was so intimidating that suzaku found it sudden that he remembered to breathe. something bugs him about this and the screaming instinct to  **back out** struck him. suzaku can't back out since he's always wanted to become a knight to protect euphemia. it had been his heaviest vow.

(  _ but why does his gut scream at him to not do it? _ )

suzaku nods as he gets on a knee to a proper bow as he places a fist over his heart. "yes, my emperor. i wish to request a rank in the rounds. i wish to protect my princess from harm." he admits as his green eyes stare at the elegant, clean tiled floors. (  **_liar liar liar!_ ** ) suzaku's heart thumped erratically as the voice screamed at his (  _ so-called _ ) reason. so all he had to wait with baited breath for the emperor's decision.

charles contemplated, "hm… i don't want to make a hasty decision. however, if you can prove yourself i will grant you a seat." he nodded and suzaku's heart skipped a beat. he had to prove himself? he restrains himself from eagerness as he bit back his voice. kami, this was torture. "there are several rebels named zero and l.l. that are attempting to cause chaos within the order. i need you to at least take one of them to me, dead or alive. then you will gain a seat."

(  _ don't do it,  _ **_you idiot_ ** _ , don't, you'll  _ **_regret_ ** _ it _ )

suzaku ignores the voice that curses at him, "of course. where do i begin?" he asks, shuddering slightly when seeing the chilling smile on the emperor's face.

for it was for his dear euphemia.

s suzaku prepares to find plans for his future promotion, at the grand villa near the babel casino held by clovis; a figure walks through the back entrance with masked figures knocking out the security getting in their way. the mission called for subtle casualties and the lack of evidence to trail them. 

"the backway is cleared off. delta team inside cleared it as well, posing as the security. it starts in five minutes so do us proud." the figure wearing the bird mask informs as they land next to the one donning the cape. after the figure bows, the unseen silhouette simply nods several times. their informant vanished after the confirmation. 

with a deep breath, they placed the elaborate mask over their head to finish off the suit and cape given to them. after a few seconds of calming themselves down they stepped out from behind curtains where the britannian mass were celebrating an anniversary of the day where the japanese were theirs to control. they could even see some japanese used for entertainment and some dressed for eye candy. gloved hands curl into tight fists as the lights cut out.

_ 'we're ready on our end, zero.' _

"thank you, l.l." the one named zero mutters as a singular light shined upon them, they suddenly spread their arms wide as murmurs echo and shock spreads through the crowd. had this been part of an elaborate show of entertainment? if so it seemed a bit too dramatic for their liking but then again it  _ was _ prince clovis.

"people of britannia! i see you still treat those not your kind as savages! as subhuman! for that i must present to you a warning if you wish to keep doing so!"

it had been  _ predictable _ for the crowd to react in their own outburst, some mocking the mysterious figure for being so  **bold** . zero could hear the amused chuckle of l.l. in the back of their mind as they place a hand to their heart as if wounded. 

"i am so shocked you think i'm bluffing! well, it seems i have to show you something quite  **_astonishing_ ** !" they raised their right arm and snapped their fingers, somehow the simple motion echoed in the ballroom. "i present to you,  **marrybell mel britannia** !" they announce as the tied up hero princess was dragged out onto the stage in which caused cries of outrage.

"how does this make you feel?" they raise their voice as the masked individuals began to yank her wings out, long and blue like the clouds in the cloudy skies. 

"unhand my wings, you savages! you all, will be executed by the emperor!" marrybell shouts at them, paling when they pointed a cold chill of the gun right between her eyes. "n-no, you wouldn't!"

"i am zero, one of the miracles and punishers of those who ruin the balance by tipping into the chaotic side of law! i, along with the  **burakkuōdā** , will fix what couldn't be fixed before! even if it means to use tainted lives as an example."

" **don't--** !!"

the sound of marrybell and the helpless citizens outraging rang as the sound of a bullet, then another, joins in. and from his seat clovis drops his drink with mouth agape, and l.l. smirks from his hiding spot in the higher box seats with a tablet in his grasp.

"checkmate, at least school will be less irritating as of now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Burakkuōdā means black order.


End file.
